Stewie-pore

To those of you who are probably wondering otherwise now, let me just say that I didn't go to Singapore just to stay in a Singaporean apartment with a Singaporean Microwave (ok fine Addee.. Singaporean PR Microwave) to blow up a Singaporean curry puff :(

I was in Singapore mainly for work but also for some sight-seeing.

My baby made me promise that I could go down and do all the work I wanted (and neglect her while I was at it) under the condition that I had to take her to Sentosa to see the pink dolphins which I did.

In my opinion the pink dolphins looked pretty much half-dead but my baby slapped me when I said that so from now on I shall just say they looked as healthy as Timon & Pumba in the Lion King.

So healthy that they might as well have been singing pink dolphins:

HAKUNA MATATA... WHAT A WONDERFUL PHRASE!!!

I must say that I was pretty impressed with Sentosa considering that everyone has always told me that there is nothing to see in Sentosa.

I was impressed with their little "Sentosa Public Transport System"

I was impressed with the landscaping...

and more importantly I was impressed with ice-cream stalls they put all around the island for me to indulge in.


Oh and before I forget, I was also impressed by how they forced me to go see the Underwater World by packaging the dolphin tickets with the Underwater World tickets.

Basically... if you want to see the dolphins, you have to buy the ticket to see the Underwater World as well

(I didn't want to go to the Underwater World not because I hate fish but because I've been there before long ago while I was still a Little Stewie).

After I satisfied my baby with the pink dolphins, it was my turn to be happy.


I wanted to see THE MERLION!!!

The half-mermaid-half-lion symbol of Singapore!

So I got my Singaporean friend to bring me to see the famous Merlion only to be disappointed

It was tiny!!! I always thought the Merlion would be much BIGGER !!!

I kicked up a big fuss and I told my very tolerant Singaporean friend that I wanted to see a BIGGER MERLION!!!

So... he thought about it for a few minutes and brought me here.


Ahh... that's more like it... Singapore Boleh!

Yet, in spite of all these little fun touristy attractions, I must say that my favourite part of Singapore are the people.
Hanging out with some of Ming's Singaporean friends... I marvel at how Singaporeans can be so educated and yet have a fun, looney side.



Many Singaporeans speak fluent top-notch English. Yet they can occasionally turn on a Singlish side that does not just have the usual "lahs" or "lors".

For example,

The word government is pronounced gahmen.

Excuse me is pronounced Eskew Me.

Rolex is pronounced Lolex.

and there are funny terms like "Show Half Ball" which is used to describe a woman showing a substantial amount of clevage.

Anyway, at the end of the trip... pink dolphin or no pink dolphin, merlion or no merlion, and singlish or no singlish...

I had my duty to take my baby for a romantic dinner that cost me half a Lolex.

Of course, the bill in Sing Dollars turned out to be reasonable. But when I multiplied the amount by 2.3 to convert it to Malaysian Ringgit... my balls dropped.

If anyone of you Singaporeans manage to find my two balls... (which was last seen in this restaurant)

please carefully place them in an envelope and mail them back to me in Penang (by registered post with insurance please).