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  • Monday, November 28, 2005

    What is Proton HIGH on this this time?

    When they launched the Proton Savvy sometime earlier this year, I remember thinking: "They can't possibly go any lower than this... This HAS GOT to be the bottom". I was wrong. I keep forgetting that Malaysia memang boleh!

    Sometime next month, the mighty Proton Chancellor is going to be launched.Now lets take a good look at the piece of shit. (I was THIS close to posting a picture of a piece of shit so that you can compare the shit to the Chancellor and spot the similiarities... but I thought I've already disgusted enough readers this month).

    Yes... it IS a STRECHED PROTON WAJA! What the fark is it with Proton trying to stretch their BUDGET cars and call them LUXURY cars? We don't see Perodua stretching their Kancils and calling them Perodua Kancil Executive do we?


    But what really got me choking on my rice was when I found out that the Chancellor is built to target the market of "high-ranking Government officers, corporate heads and senior executives." Just listening to that statement made me very very much dumber.

    I can see it right now: The wealthy corporate heads and senior executives are going to burn their Bentleys, BMWs and Mercs to make space for a PROTON CHANCELLOR in their garage.

    And when I return to Malaysia, I'm going to beg my daddy to buy me a Proton Chancellor. When he does, I'm gonna drive it out and show it off to my friends. I bet my London flatmate who drives a BMW 7 Series in KL would look at it and say:

    "OMG OMG OMG !!!! YOU DRIVE A PROTON CHANCELLOR!?!?!?! YOU LUCKY SONOFABITCH!!! ALL I HAVE IS THIS STUPID BMW 7 SERIES!!! "

    And I bet the girls on the street would turn their heads when I drive past them and think "Ooh... A Proton Chancellor... so so sexy... I would LURRRVEE to DO the driver."

    The good news for us is that the design of the car is only half the laugh. The real joke comes in the marketing campaign.

    My mind flashbacks to a few months ago during summer. Back then, it probably was a good idea to start a marketing campaign aiming to convince the public that Proton cars are safer than people think. But the candidate that Proton picked made it look like they were eating fried cow shit when they thought up the marketing plan.


    Lets be honest here. Your parents must have dropped you really hard on the head when you were young for you to think that this small little piece of shit car is indeed SAFE!


    I wait eagerly to see how they would market the Chancellor. What could they possibly come up with now?

    Proton Chancellor... PIMP MOBIL... ???

    Proton Chancellor... FOR THE MAN IN YOU???

    Either ways.. we are in for a goood Christmas.

    Sometimes I think of Proton as an expensive form of entertainment. We all pay to subsidise it so we can all laugh and make fun of it whenever they come up with something stupid (which is pretty often). LONG LIVE PROTON !!!! LONG LIVE PROTON !!!

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