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  • Tuesday, November 29, 2005

    Every man has to have a Dockers....

    Yes I do mean it, you and me. I love my Dockers since the first day i put it on, which was...... not too long ago :D Got it on a cheap from this shop I couldn't remember the name but it's in Bangsar Shopping Centre, go up the second floor and head for the left wing, it's sort of like a factory outlet. Anyway you can find really cheap clothes there, got my Dockers for less than RM100 which if I went to a store would cost me around RM200-300 range.

    Anyway what you are about to read is highly informational and it's not meant to be funny. Keep this in mind ok? In fact I really wanna write this post for a friend's page at http://www.the-consumers.com/ so Aaron if u reading this, feel free to cut and paste and modify and watever. BTW, there are offensive languages here so..... ;)

    So let's start with "what is Dockers?"
    What is Dockers?
    I mean to ask this question if you are a guy, shame on you, you should cut your penis off and hang it somewhere all the girls can spit saliva on.(btw this is not supposed to arouse u) I shall introduce to you what I think is superior to levi's and ought to be santa's choice of brand if he were to find a new pair of trousers.

    Oh yea baby, worship the logo.
    Worship the holy grail of manhood.
    Worship the king of KHAKI!!!
    Worship the brand that gives us something our little brother can finally feel safe in.
    What I'm telling you is that if you wear the trousers with this logo on it, girls will be attracted to you for it magnifies your manhood x 100.
    Come on it's true, haven't you been to GSC or TGV to watch a movie?
    The girl in the ads is like "OOHHH I can see what's behind that and I want it so badly yada yada"

    Ok, so maybe it's not about the brand. Coz if there's something I love about them it's certainly not the brand.
    The success story of this brand is due to QUALITY.
    Scroll down to see what I mean.




    Yea so look this is my Dockers after i wore it n times. (n to denote I lost count)
    Still clean, and trust me on this 1.
    The image of a Dockers Khaki is "smart casual" so whenever you see on an invitation to some event that says "Dress Code: Smart Casual" go with your Dockers and amaze them. Yesh Yesh, everybody will look at you and think "This guy has such a bad fashion sense" or "You think he's here for the event?" yea oh well, to hell with them, they know nothing that we do.

    If you're thinking right now "but it just looks ordinary", read on and you get what I meant by quality

    Now this is the inside waist part of the Dockers Khaki. See the grey lining there, well, it's this really rubbery linen which allows you to wear a Dockers without belt. So you can take your mind off imagining "what if my pants slipped down and the girl of my dreams sees that I have a wiener as small as an ant", rest assured, she won't find that out until she forcefully slide the pants down you and hopefully without leaving you with a burn mark due to that friction on your waistline :P

    Now comes the star of the show, if you spill water on your clothes what do you get?
    Well....... it depends.......Now that's quality.......

    But it's not the star I was referring to, this is....

    Yup, the star of the Dockers Khaki series is the material they use on the khaki itself. It's often what we refer to as Teflon. Oh yea, Teflon is a material developed by some guy at Dupont. What's cool is that liquid would just flow on the material and slides off as you tilt the cloth. It never wets the cloth, that is seriously COOL. I mean imagine when you are watching some porn and suddenly(only you not me, i'm strong) you came. Then your mom walked in and to your luck, you turn the monitor away in time. Guess what? There ain't no stain on your trousers as well, SERIOUSLY COOL!!!!! hehehehe As I said that's you, not me, I'm strong :D



    The other nice feature about this pants is that it has loads of pocket space. Just look, you even have a hidden zip at the bottom of your thigh, wow you could keep a PDA there, or an Ipod there.
    Very handy, I mean just think about the amount of things you could fit in there and nobody knows about it.
    For starters i was thinking of pistols, grenades, mini ninja turtles or even a handful of condoms. LOL nobody knows it's there, sneaky eh?











    Well, so here is another useful feature about Dockers. I've found out that Teflon as a mousepad could give you the best mousing experience ever. Look, this material has the "lowest friction coefficient of any solid material yet discovered" I took it from this site. It sells mousepad which is made from Teflon and boy, look at the price they are selling it.
    I'll tell you what, for that same price I could cut a Dockers into as many as 10 square pieces to make 10 mousepads. Such a RIP OFF. Yea so I tried to play CS on this new mousepad of mine.

    But first, check out those notty actions. Argh what can I do to get some decency these days?

    Who am I kidding? I just died in CS, got totally owned by bots, maybe it's my skills, but then I'm putting all the blame on the Teflon. It's just a bit too smooth for me. Doesn't mean the mouse slides too much, just means that well, it's a bit too smooth from all the chatting up with my mouse LOL. Sad couple. Maybe they do coordinate well, again I'm going to mention that drop of water, you know, I didn't really put it there, it was just........ THERE.

    Well I would say that this khaki is gonna be with me for a long long time, thru thick and thin, thru changes of mice and maybe one day it will settle down with a decent mouse. But who are we kidding? It's too smooth to settle down.

    So, the next time you are in Bangsar Shopping Centre, do take a look around the shop and get yourself one of these Dockers. Trust me, before I could even mention, W-A-T------E-R you will have already seen some sliding down that pants you are holding :D

    p.s. such passion.......

    p.p.s. I promise to be less vulgar and more children-friendly next time

    p.p.p.s. I'm still figuring out how that spot of water get there

    6 Comments:

    • great marketing effort for dockers boss... but sorry... mou....

      but after reading this post.. i do feel like going down to oxford street and getting myself a pair of dockers

      By Blogger Boss Stewie, at November 29, 2005 6:28 PM  

    • hahahaha mou
      using pants as a mousepad is soooooooo.......machan-ish

      By Blogger William, at November 29, 2005 9:31 PM  

    • hahahha
      why would u say that william?

      By Blogger Boss Stewie, at November 29, 2005 10:08 PM  

    • cuz who in the right mind would use PANTS as a mousepad?
      unless like lepton said the pants are cut up or something
      pants are pants are not mousepads, and mousepads are not pants
      unless u're a machan and think bumiputra only applies ONLY to malays
      which they do.

      By Blogger William, at November 30, 2005 4:33 PM  

    • hmmm... more than 15 dockers pants in my closet.... Slim fit, Regular fit, Mobile Pants, Bermudas, etc.... guess I'm a dockers freak....sadly they dont sell it here in Japan !!!
      a leng for your review

      By Anonymous Anonymous, at December 01, 2005 9:01 PM  

    • Where did you find it? Interesting read » » »

      By Anonymous Anonymous, at March 05, 2007 8:12 AM  

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