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  • Friday, February 03, 2006

    Math students are all LAME......

    Ok, this is a post deserving MOU^100000 because Boss Lepton is so extremely bored and depressed that he hasn't thought of anything to write for the past week. Now Boss Lepton knows that readers will all be really really really sad ya know, coz Boss Lepton is such a lovable and adorable person.

    Come on, I know you guys miss me, tell me so.....

    At the time of typing, Boss Lepton is in the library(sort of) trying to do some work and revise for the up-coming tests. However, as Boss Lepton tries to cramp all those mathematical equations(or inequalities, depending on which level you are on), the mind of Boss Lepton wonders off to think of jokes related to all those equations.

    Now, I know that I have heard these jokes somewhere but then I'll retell it. So bear with Boss Lepton, grab a cup of coke, get some potato chips(Walkers for those from UK, Lays for those from US, Twisties for those from Malaysia), and read the following boring, lifeless, lame, and hard to understand jokes which would only strike you if you're an extremely lifeless geek who looks at computer screen for days and days without moving your FAT ASS off that chair.(YES, that implies you Sin Thean if you're reading)

    Note: Somebody please tell Sin Thean to stop WoW-ing and remind him that he has a gf lol.

    Ok here goes:

    *laughters and applauds*
    *imagine you're watching a stand-up comedy performed by Boss Lepton*
    *and assisted by Boss Stewie*
    (sorry boss gotta get u into the picture)

    Boss Lepton: Ok, I don't care what country you guys are from, but there is sure 1 thing that I know you all have in common, that is that you all have brains. That's right, B-R-A-I-N-S.

    Boss Stewie: Huh? You sure boss? Eh boss come on la, I can't believe it boss.

    Boss Lepton: Well, boss, of course they have brains. Come on, guys have brains somewhere down there and the ladies....... let's say that they have the brains to control guys' brains.

    Boss Stewie: ......... boss you're lame boss.

    Boss Lepton: Slack la, I haven't start telling my jokes yet. Ok, so there was this mad scientist, he kidnapped this engineer, this physicist and this mathematician. He locked each of them inside an enclosed room, separately, with some can foods and water but without a can opener. Boss, you know what happened when that mad scientist came back after a week?

    Boss Stewie: I think I know, I've always been good at these guessing games. Let me guess, the engineer managed to open the cans and survive, the physicist er...... dunno, the mathematician died of hunger. Correct ar?

    Boss Lepton: Hmmm, half correct la. Actually the engineer managed to make a can opener from his pocket trash, yes engineers always keep their pockets full of trash. He opened the can, dried the food, then re-use the can and dried sugar extract fro mthe food to make a bomb, blast a hole and got out from the room. Geng right? Engineers ma, geng 1.

    The physicist more ho-liao. The physicist can calculate the right angle of impact which would make the can open when thrown against the wall. So, she still not dead, but her throws become quite geng and became an expert in quantum theory.

    But the last 1, the mathematician, he's so sad ler, die over there only. The mad scientist found the corpse clinging to the wall, with some writings on it that says:

    Theorem: If I don't open these cans, I'll die.

    Proof: Assume the opposite.

    *crowds goes puzzled*

    Boss Stewie: Oi boss, what kind of joke is this? I cannot understand la.

    Boss Lepton: Aiyo, told you strictly for geeks only. It means that the mathematician assumes the opposite which is "If I don't open these cans, I'll live". Then he doesn't live, so ladies and gentlemen, it's a contradiction, so the assumption is wrong and thus the theorem is proven. Easy eh?

    Boss Stewie: Leh mah, boss you expect me to give you a LENG for that?

    Boss Lepton: No ah, if you think that was lame, wait til you hear the next 1. Ok well, ladies and gentlemen, what do you think if I propose to you the following statement.

    "The limit as n tends to infinity of (sin x/n) is 6." Intriguing isn't it boss? What do you think?

    Boss Stewie: Cheh, that is obviously not true. That, ladies and gents, is definitely not true. Boss, you call yourself a mathematician ar?

    Boss Lepton: No I call myself a statistician.

    Boss Stewie: Aiyo same thing la. We all know the answer to that is 0. One over infinity is 0 la boss, think boss THINK.

    Boss Lepton: oh really? But I have the proof. We have to simplify (sin x/n) take away the n from the denominator and the numerator. Voila we proved.

    *applause from the audience*

    Boss Stewie: Cheh, still not worthy of a LENG.

    Boss Lepton: Hmm, obviously this is not lame enough for you? Ok, I'll try again.

    There was this bus which goes from Bangsar to Midvalley. Assume la assume, I don't know if there's such a bus or not. One day, as usual, this bus was full with all these weird people la. Then all of a sudden, this mad guy ran up the bus with a parang and started to threaten everybody on the bus. "Give me all your money, or I'll integrate you, or I'll differentiate you." Wah, panic all these people, all reaching inside their bag. Some even pretended to reach for money when in fact they don't have any. There's just this one guy, who wasn't even panicking. In fact, he stood up and walked towards the mad guy with the parang. "Oh please please, differentiate me, INTEGRATE ME MORE" This time the mad guy started to tremble, wah superhero to save the day ar? He asked,"Eh what are you, man of steel?" That guy replied,"No la, I'm just e^x."

    Boss Stewie: Hahahaha, boss, that was just lame. But how come he wants to be integrated more?

    Boss Lepton: Aiseh, easy ler, do your integration. If you integrate ar, you'll get e^x + Cha Boh ma. Ish like that also don't know. Go back to A levels and cry to Miss Jeanne, ask her to spank you in the ass, spank it real well.

    Boss Stewie: .............. niama

    Well how was it? Lame isn't it? Hehehe, maybe maybe maybe if you guys sign a petition ar, to request that Boss Lepton and Boss Stewie to do a stand-up comedy in your birthday party ar, we might consider you know? So how? Can consider bo?

    p.s. eh boss, considering that this post is all words and no photos ar, what you think? not bad eh? heheheh sigh, I don't have photo editting programs on library computer ler.


    • lol
      wtf u expect ppl to get the e^x + cha boh ahh
      u dun let c is COCK or CROSS-DRESSING GELENGKIA ahh

      i only understand the 1st joke, the other two are as though.....
      nvm la bos, i'll give u the 'benefit of a doubt'

      By Blogger William, at February 03, 2006 3:15 PM  

    • uhmm....
      i don't know what to say boss....

      By Blogger Boss Stewie, at February 03, 2006 6:03 PM  

    • ok boss
      after reading it over and over again.. i finally know what to say di...

      sorry.. but its a mou boss...
      u would have to have done at least a-level maths to understand SOME of it at leasttt

      By Blogger Boss Stewie, at February 03, 2006 6:21 PM  

    • niama hehhehehe

      izzit ar?
      u blardy never laugh ar?
      i getting suspicious :P

      FINE hehehe

      By Blogger Boss Lepton, at February 03, 2006 6:35 PM  

    • no boss
      i didn't laugh at all.. not even the slightest giggle

      By Blogger Boss Stewie, at February 03, 2006 7:38 PM  

    • uhh...i thought u already expected a mou
      that already gave me an impression of what i was expecting rofl

      By Blogger William, at February 03, 2006 7:53 PM  

    • err..I don't think maths and stand up comoedy can mix very well..

      By Blogger yuin, at February 03, 2006 9:23 PM  

    • dude .... thats the lamest shit i've heard for ages... LENG XD

      By Anonymous linlin, at February 03, 2006 11:28 PM  

    • see boss.. i'm not biased.. it really is a mou

      By Blogger Boss Stewie, at February 04, 2006 1:03 AM  

    • OMG...Speechless.....Erm... Well, I'm a mathematician myself... But I dun think I've actually come up with such lame jokes b4. The furthest I've gone was " Oh Baby!!!I want to be your derivatives...
      So that I can be tangent to all your curves" ;)

      By Anonymous Anonymous, at February 04, 2006 8:25 PM  


      Oh Baby!!!I want to be your derivatives...
      So that I can be tangent to all your curves" ;)


      By Blogger Boss Stewie, at February 05, 2006 12:41 AM  

    • Dear Boss Lepton:

      i honestly think that there's a special school for you somewhere, where special people like you are *ahem* "quarantined". though it might be a little expensive, i think its the right place for you to be.


      Dr. Phil

      By Anonymous adrian, at February 13, 2006 6:23 PM  

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